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Desu

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  1. Skjønner ikke at dette er noe å lage en så stor sak ut av.

    Det eneste som muligens kommer til å skje er at du får en kommentar som "har du klipt deg?"

    Da svarer du selvsagt ja, og livet går videre.

     

    Og om du mister draget på damene så er det ikke sveisen sin feil.

  2. >Be 16

    >Beta as fuck

    >Sister's 19 y/o friend round house doing studying or some shit

    >Sister's friend is shit hot

    >Parent's out, I'm downstairs playing vidya

    >All of a sudden hear shouting and arguing upstairs

    >Dafuq?

    >Sister runs downstair, tears streaming down face

    >I ask if she's ok - don't really give a flying fuck

    >"Fuck off anon"

    >Storms out front door

    >Stand there dumbfounded

    >Hear sister's friend call my name from upstairs

    >I slowly come up stairs, confused still

    >Open door slowly

    >Holy fuck! Sister's friend newd down to her socks, wearing MY dressing gown

    >"Hey anon... you ever had your dick sucked?"

    >Instaboner

    >She gets slowly onto knees keeping eyecontact

    >Unzips my jeans, giggling

    >Strokes a finger down my shaft

    >Her face goes white and shocked

    >"I.... I....."

    >She shits fucking EVERYWHERE!

    >Not just like a quick splurge - this is a constant heavy flow of fecal matter

    >What the fu-?

    >Shit level in room now way past ankel height

    >Raise my hand - ready to smack the bitch down

    >Look closer

    >Girl is actually a 4ft latino man called "Enrique"

    >"Pleasing sir! No make heet my face! I beg!"

    >Shit Level = Knees

    >I give in. No way I can punish someone with eyes as cute and defencless as his.

    >I grab the doorknob from my sister's door and detatch it.

    >Shove the fucker right up his sphincte

    >Shitflow stops.

    >I look at him with a smile and a glint in my eye

    >"Come on you, hop on!"

    >Give him a piggyback out of room.

    >We got married later that day in the registry office.

    >Both now in our late eighties living in a small flat in Wales.

    >Still remember that day fondly.

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